Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
