just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
