Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
