Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
