Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
that is very illegal...i love you.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
