If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
