D3 body, D1 cock
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
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