You just made me feel so damn special
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
