She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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