I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
