I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
