no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
