How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
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