he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
