please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Shame is for Republicans.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
