never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
