it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
