so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I supernannyed him into submission
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
