Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
