There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I'm at about main and main street
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
