she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Just puked most of my soul out..
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