It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
