it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
