You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
i will never coherently bang her
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Randomize
