you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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