Do you still have your period?
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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