I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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