As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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