i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
