you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize