its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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