what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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