I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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