i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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