i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
