That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Randomize
