i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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