I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize