If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
