I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
