I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Randomize
