help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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