based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
