I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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