new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
