it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
