i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Randomize
