Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
