oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
