He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
